Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Confinement? Or not?

You'll forgive me today if I use today's post as an opportunity to think out loud. This past Sunday for our small group we focused on Psalm 127. And a pair of verses and my husband's questions to the group really have had me thinking all week so far.

"4 Children born to a young man
are like arrows in a warrior’s hands.
5 How joyful is the man whose quiver is full of them!" Psalm 127:4-5

And then this one is on my mind too.

"5
Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
6
in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight.
7
Do not be wise in your own eyes;
fear the LORD and shun evil. "Proverbs 3:5-7

So my question to myself this week is am I confining God in my home and life? Are Andy and I confining God and limiting what he can do for us by choosing to have two children? This is a really big thought to put out there for me. We've talked many times about things that we want to do together after our children are grown and have families of their own. Andy was just discussing lately how he is certain God has plans for us to do his work in the future. That has me thinking too. When I think about what we could possibly do that would be considered "God's work" I can see us doing something like church planting or becoming missionaries to another area. But when I think about those... why wouldn't I want to do those WITH my children. The more I think on it, the more I don't see why we would wait until our children are grown to embark on a "mission for God."

I've really been having some bizarre thoughts this week. I of course wonder all the time what God has in store for us. But could he have something different for us than what we think? I am sure that is a strong possibility. Could he want us to expand our family? Since Zander was born I've felt our family has been complete, but since the minute Andy read that verse on Sunday about having a full quiver, I can't help but wonder if we are limiting God's blessings in our lives by choosing to stop at two blessings. God has proven to us 100% over the last five months that he will provide for us in all circumstances. Would he not continue to provide if he continued to bless us with a larger family? And is my husband a blessed man with a quiver full? Or is he missing some of his quivers because we want to control the children we have. This is a very complicated question.

And of course, as I'm thinking these thoughts this week, in the news is the Duggar family from Arkansas- a wonderful God-loving family with child number 17 due in July. Yeah- you read that right, child #17. They have chosen a life of allowing God to bless them as much as possible, and he continues to do so. That right there is frightening to me, yet it's not frightening to this family. And even more amazing to me about this family is that they are completely debt free. God has provided for their every need- every single need that a family with 17 children could possibly need. That is truly amazing, and at least to me this family is an example of putting faith and trust in God.

So am I trusting in the Lord with all my heart? I like to think so, but obviously not if the issue of having a "full quiver" is making me think hard this week. This is obviously an important matter and one to discuss further with Andy, but in the meantime... lots to think on and pray on and ask God about.

"So then, don't be afraid. I will provide for you and your children." And he reassured them and spoke kindly to them." Genesis 50:21

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